I have been a fan of author Eric Jerome Dickey’s for almost ten years. His words about,love sex,and life from an African American perspective have always resonated with me. He doesn’t cast his characters as “cheap hoods“ or “gold diggin’ baby mamas“ or “side chicks“ like alot of today’s black literature. He makes them CEOs of companies or well off entrepeneurs and gives their lives a complexity that I love. I finished his most recent work, Decadence last week and I absolutely fell in love with his main character,Nia Simone Bijou.
She is a self made woman who lives her life the way she wants. She doesn’t bend to any man’s will but that’s not to say she’s some sort of feminist man hater. Nia makes it crystal clear how she feels about sex and relationships With my current love life being in the dumps, I have been thinking alot about what kind of relationship I want and how I feel about myself in relationships. Nia sums up what I feel in this monologue:
“I crave love. I am human, and love I do need because love fuels us,but with the fear that resides in my heart,and now,not now,but lately,very lately,realizing I have an unhealed wound, I can’t cathect love,can’t invest emotional energy into something so wonderful,yet so destructive. And that does not mean that I don’t believe in love. Sure, it could work forever,but the odds are that it will eventually expire. I am an artist. I am a writer. I am fickle… I am underrated and yet people expect too much. I am restless. I am not a woman who feels that she is put on earth to seek out a husband,but one day i will and know that in the end he will suffer…I am outrageous in private and yet I am at times,shy in public. Take me as I am. Accept me as I am. Take my fears. This is me“.
– Nia Simone Bijou
from Decadence by Eric Jerome Dickey