Monthly Archives: January 2014

Growing Up

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Recently,I went to my best friend’s baby shower. She just had a gorgeous little girl& I wanted to see how motherhood was changing her. I remember how it changed me (for the better) and it was she seemed so happy with her new role in life.

A few weeks later,we had a phone conversation and we talked about how much our lives’ and our friends’ lives have changed. Two of my closest friends are married,my best friend is getting married next year,and most
of us are parents. All I can think is ‘When did we grow up? How did we go from cutting class in high school to becoming parents and spouses?’ Our lives aren’t turning out the way we planned (but then again you know what they say “When you make plans,God laughs”),life is just…happening to us.

I have to admit although I am the best mother I can be,I’m not just a mom.I used to be a teenager with dreams of taking the journalism world by storm. Now,I’m a woman in my almost(four months to be exact) mid-twenties who is running out of time to be all that she can be and is not as confident in her dream as she used to be. My friends are accomplishing so much and I’m just…stuck!As proud as I am of my friends,I am a tad jealous of them.

My best friend helped me focus on what I need to do.She reminded me that I’m not a little girl anymore and if I keep accepting the way things are now,they’ll NEVER change.She even gave me a three month deadline to get my self together(the audacity of that heifer). I’m going to pull myself out of this little rut,put my big girl panties on,and…GROW UP!!!
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The tall glass of chocolate milk in the back is one of my closest friends who is commited to his bachelor lifestyle( he doesn’t count regarding this post) and the lovely lady on the right is my bff.Doesn’t motherhood look good on her?

Anti Breakage Challenge (Part Two) Week 4& My 2014 Hair Staples

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The final week of the Anti Breakage Challenge was the same as Week One. The only thing I changed was the moisturizong conditioner.Instead of TRESemme Moisture Rich Conditioner,I used ORS Hair Masque.I really like the hair masque but I had left it alone for awhile to try other conditioners.I’ve decided to keep it as a staple.Speaking of staples,after using 2013 as a year to try all kinds of products,I have finally decided what products and brands I’ll be sticking to.Every  now and then I’ll switch it up,but the following are going to be my mainstays.

Weekly Shampoos
1)Creme of Nature w/Argan Oil from Morroco sulfate free shampoo
2)Shea Moisture Moisture Retention shampoo w/Argan Oil and Sea Kelp

Monthly Shampoo
Normally I would list the ORS Creamy Aloe Shampoo as a staple but because my money is funny,I decided to do a little DIY hair stuff.Its cheaper because alot of the ingredients can be found in my cabinets,so its pretty much free.So,I will be doing a monthly ACV rinse.It clarifies just like the shampoo so why not?

Protein Conditioners
1)ORS Hair Mayo
2)Aphogee Kerstin 2 Minute Reconstructor
*NOTE* These will only be used monthly

Moisturizing Conditioners
1)ORS Hair Masque
2)Shea Moisture Restorative Conditioner w/Argan Oil&Sea Kelp (doubles as a leave in)
3)TRESemmé Luxurious Moisture Conditioner

OILS
1)EVOO(extra virgin olive oil)
2)Argan Oil
3)EVCO (extra virgin coconut oil)

MOISTURIZERS/STYLERS
1)ORS Incredibly Rich Oil Hair Lotion
2)Creme of Nature w/Argan Oil from Morocco Oil Moisturizer
3)ECO Styler Argan Oil Styling Gel
4)ECO Styler Olive Oil Styling Gel
5)ORS Smooth N Hold Pudding (for my ponytails)

Now this past year,I have also come across some really great hair blogs.If you guys are just stepping into the natural hair community, you’re obviously going to need help.All the things I learned,I got from hair blogs,hair magazines,and You Tube videos.Here are what I consider the cremé de la cremé of all hair media:

HAIR BLOGS
1)Good Hair Diaries
2)Curly Nikki
3)Care For Your Hair
4)Chocolate Hair Vanilla Care(for the little ones)
5)Beads Braids Beyond (also for the little ones

HAIR MAGAZINES
1)Sophosticates Black Hair
2)Hype Hair

YOUTUBE CHANNELS
1) YolandaRenee
2)Naptural85
3)rorychvc

My hope is that WOC will start giving their hair a chance tp beautiful before relaxing,straightening,or weaving. I am not against any of that,but do you want to show off what God gave you? I do. The most important thing about natural hair is its health. It may take awhile for it to get healthy,but trust me its worth it!

My 5 Parenting Tips to Young Moms

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Recently,a close friend of mine joined the mommy club and another friend of mine has mommy burn out.Their situations are different but in talking with them I noticed I gave them similar advice on how to deal with being a mom. I was given plenty of advice on how to raise my daughter(don’t  hold the baby all day, give her lots of fruits and veggies, limit her tv time,etc…)but parenting goes so much deeper than the child. As a young parent, you have to grow up too.With that being said here are 5 tips on how to deal with parenting and finding yourself.

1)SEEK ADVICE FROM YOUR PARENTS. Just because you are now a parent,doesn’t mean you don’t need your own parents. I have learned that when I have to make difficult parenting decisions,I seek my mother’s help first. Your mom and dad,aunties,uncles helped raised you so they have a wealth of knowledge on the subject as well as other things. Not only that, they are perfect when you need a shoulder to cry on when you are not having a good day.Use them not only for a sitter,but also when you temporarily want to revert back to being “Mama’s baby”.You’ll always need your mom and dad,I don’t care what you say.

2)TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. I know of some moms(myself included) who pour everything they have into their children and neglect themselves.When you go shopping,stop spending all your money on your child.Get yourself something even if its something small,like a bottle of nail polish or a tube of lipstick.Get your rest,go on a date,or just go hang out with yourself.When you’re stressed out,it affects how you raise your kids.Whether you became a mom at 17 or 37,we all need a breather.

3)TURN OFF THE TECH. I’m well aware that we live in the technology age.I am SSSSOOOO guilty of being addicted to my social media for my owm personal use as well as blog business,but even I know when to turn it off. When you turn off the tech, spend time with your kids. Read to them, play with them, and most importantly,LISTEN to them.When you do, you learn so much about them. Your attentive ear sends the message that what’s going on with their lives matters.Social media will always be around,your kids will only be little once.

4)STOP FREAKING OUT.When Bubba got her first cold at 2 months old,I bawled like…well,a baby.For some reason,I was convinced that I waa the sole reason my baby had a runny nose and a slightly high fever.How could I let this happen? My aunt explained to me that all children get sick and its unavoidable. In fact,she read an article that said colds build up immmunity.You’re not a terrible mom just because things like sickness, trips& falls,or naughty behavior happen. All these things are apart of growing up and sometimes no matter how careful you are, accidents are inevitable. Think of it this way: when you freak out,your child will freak out and think the worst which only makes the situation worse.You don’t want that do you? So,calm down.

5)ENJOY THE BABY STAGE. I just went shopping for my best friend’s newborn and being in the baby store bought back so many memories. I remember getting frustrated looking for misplaced pacifiers and warming bottles of formula. I miss lugging around an overpacked diaper bag every time I went out with her and rocking Bubba to sleep.Now I have a rambunctious independent big girl who doesn’t need me to feed her,change her,or hold her to get her to sleep.If you’re still iin the “baby stage”, savor every moment,because it’s gone in the blink of an eye.

WHAT ARE SOME OTHER TIPS YOUNGER MOMS COULD USE?WHAT DO YOU WISH SOMEONE WOULD HAVE TOLD YOU?

Anti Breakage Challenge (Part Two):Week Three

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For week three, I pre poo’d with Tresemme Moisture Rich Conditioner for half an hour.I used my Shea Moisture:Moisture Retention shampoo.As always,I only shampooed once so as to use less product because my hair wasn’t super dirty or anything.
For my.light protein conditioner,I used a tablespoon or two of ORS Mayo with lots of EVOO added. I was supposed to let it sit under a hooded dryer but I don’t have one so I used my hand dryer and let Bubba run it over my head(with a conditioning cap on) for 30 mins. She wanted to do it,which was a bonus for me.

I did my leave in and moisturized and sealed as usual. I didnt twist my hair this week because I was too lazy,so I just kept it covered with my silk scarf.The weather here in NY has been really cold and dry so the scarf was perfect.I’m a sucker for head scarves and its my go to thing most of the time.For the final week,I plan on doing a sock bun and head scarf so I’ll have a practical and easy hair do.

WHAT IS YOUR STAPLE HAIRSTYLE?