Monthly Archives: June 2015

Mommy and Me Mondays #6- The Cadet Family

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How many children do you have and what are their ages?

I have 2 children a boy and a girl, ages 2 & 4 respectively

What is ONE song that reminds you of your child(ren)?

Happy by Pharrell

How would you define your style of parenting?

I pretty much let them do what they want. I only structure some things. We like to have a good time and fly by the seat of our pants. But when things get out of hand I’m the one to disciple them. Dad has too much of a soft spot and will let them just get away with anything.

Do you have a restaurant or favorite place that you will only go with your child(ren)?

We spend a lot of time at Fort Greene Park either walking or on the playground.

What is one piece of advice you would give your child(ren) that can apply to their entire life?

Love yourself. Do not allow anyone to tear you down and make you feel worthless.

Faithful Fridays #4- Spirit Filled Summer

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Today is the last day of school for public school children here in NYC. As I dropped Bubba off at school for the last time, she looked back at me and waved. A wave of grief hit me because my mom has missed another school year in Bubba’s life. Her granddaughter has learned a lot this year. Not just in school, but in her own life. She is starting a relationship with God and her grandmother would be so proud. She ask about God and if He really does go to school with her after I’ve dropped her off. She tells me who she’s praying for and why. She is learning the difference between a wish and a prayer. Bubba has faith.

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The summer is here and although I have extremely limited financial means, I intend to make Bubba’s summer as rich and full and fun as I can. Since she’s on this spiritual journey, I plan on taking her on nature walks and to bird watching so that she can witness God’s glory. Yes, we’ll do the usual fun things that kids do in the summer and we’re going to get a jump on her 2nd grade curriculum but teaching her about God by showing her God is very important.  Enjoy your summer, everyone!

You May Quote…#9

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Today marks the 6th anniversary of the shocking death of Michael Jackson. I can’t believe its been that long already and I still can’t believe he is gone from us. In him, we lost an amazing talent for music, lyrics, and dance. For me personally, Michael was a example of how even when people are prejudiced of your uniqueness as a person, you HAVE to keep doing the thing that brings you joy and happiness. I’ve been a hardcore fan of Michael’s since I was 13 years old. Being that age things are changing physically, emotionally,and mentally and I needed something that would keep all these things in balance. Michael’s music fueled my passion for writing and encouraged to continue to march to the beat of my own drum.

The day he passed away, I had just come home from picking Bubba up from daycare. As soon as I closed the door behind me, the news reporter said “Michael Jackson has passed away”. I sent Bubba (then 2 years old) into my room where my brother was playing video games. My biological mother was sitting on the couch watching me. I sat at the dining room table and just stared off into space. I heard my mother’s slippers sliding into the kitchen. I got up and walked into the kitchen behind her and she just grabbed me to her chest and held me. I let loose sobs that I didn’t realize I would ever make. My adopted mother called from work and asked to speak to me. I was crying so hard that she couldn’t make out anything I was saying. She said “I’m on my way home” and an hour later she was holding me and telling me everything was going to be okay. My best friends also called and one asked “Are you going to kill yourself or somethin’ like that?” I actually laughed and assured that friend that I was saddened, not crazy or stupid.I watched the memorial service on television with my adopted mom and we both cried. She grew up as a fan of his music and now a part of her childhood had died. For me it was a bit more dramatic and I felt like a kindred spirit was forever lost to me.

Six years later, Bubba is now a HUGE fan of Michael’s(refuses to watch the Thriller video but has no problem watching zombies get their faces blown off on Walking Dead). Her favorite song is Black or White. She has learned through that song that everyone is different and you should love them for what they look like on the inside, not the outside. Six years later, Michael may have faded from a lot of people’s memories, but still burns vividly in my mind and heart. Whenever I can’t get words on paper, I listen to Loving You ( true fans know I am NOT talking about Who’s Loving You). When I think about Bubba, I hear Got To Be There. When I am smitten with someone I hear The Way You Make Me Feel,when I feel like dancing I hear Enjoy Yourself, and when I miss my mom I hear Will You Be There? So many songs for so many different emotions. That’s true genius and that is a true gift from God.

Mommy and Me Mondays #6- The Ewing Family

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How many children do you have and what are their ages?

Two girls ages 2(Sarah) and 4(Lissie).  Both of them have special needs.

What is ONE song that reminds you of your child(ren)?

“My Favorite Things” for Sarah and “Maneater” for Lissie.

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How would you define your style of parenting?

I am a strict parent, as is my husband.  We are both the oldest children in our families, so we were raised with pretty strict rules.  We do the same for our girls.  It’s important for us that they develop good character, so when they exhibit kindness, respect, etc, we reward them and affirm them, but when they are selfish and rude, we administer consequences (e.g., time outs, taking away toys or privileges).  It’s hard, but we’ve found that consistency is key!

Do you have a restaurant or favorite place that you will only go with your child(ren)?

There’s a local ice cream stand called “The Chief” that has hand-dipped flavors made with real cream.  We only go there with our girls every summer!

What is one piece of advice you would give your child(ren) that can apply to their entire life?

Kindness and respect (including self-respect) will get you far in life.  It doesn’t mean that people won’t betray you or treat you unfairly.  It doesn’t mean you will evade hurt and sorrow, but it does mean that you can hold your head up high, because you know who you are and you are true to yourself and your values.  Being kind ensures that you treat people with justice and mercy, that you care for those who are in need, and that you befriend people who are different from you.

Faithful Fridays #3- I Can’t Even Walk…

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I grew up in a household that played only gospel music. My mom tok me and my brother to gospel shows all the time. A gospel show is a concert with different gospel artists. The venue is usually a church and sometimes they have “anniversary gospel shows”, which is when a gospel quartet or artist celebrates how long they’ve been in the gospel music business. I always enjoyed seeing my favorite artists in person. After the show, my mom and I would walk around the church and get our favorite artists’ autograph. They were always kind and willing to stop and talk to fans and followers. One of my mother’s favorite artist was Darrell McFadden and the Disciples. She had every tape or CD he put out and when she didn’t she ran down to either Harlem’s Rainbow music store or Bobby’s Gospel Store on Pitkin Avenue in Brooklyn to get his music.

I remember this one song she loved on his CD Chronicles:Book of Songs. She would play it as she did house work or if she just needed her spirits lifted. She would close her eyes and raise her hand to the sky and just let the lyrics to the song wash over her. I didn’t understand the power that music holds in people’s lives then. Thanks to the blessing that is Youtube, I found a Youtuber that posts MANY different gospel artists music and I was pleasantly surprised when I found my mom’s favorite Darrell McFadden song ( the CD she originally had broke due to overuse). When I listened to it, it brought  back a lot of memories, but it also did something to me. It spoke to me about how I can’t do anything without God and the devil has me fooled into thinking otherwise. Growing up, we are taught that we have to learn how to do things ourselves as adults. Parents don’t always tell us that we NEVER do anything without God and that if He wants something from us, He’s going to take us through whatever we have to go through to get His end result. As the song says ” The mountains are so high and the valleys are so wide… ” but everything is possible with Him. Its a struggle for me to not just depend on myself and my earthly resources to make a life for myself and Bubba. This song reminded my mother (and now it reminds me on) the days when she had no money, on the days when food was scarce, on the days when she felt overwhelmed raising a family that she wasn’t walking alone, because none of us can walk without Him holding our hands.

You May Quote #8

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With my mother’s 50-somethingth birthday coming upon Father’s Day (how funny), I was thinking about how she feels now that she has two grown children and four grandchildren. Does she think about the mistakes she made with us growing up? How often? Does she think about the mistakes her children make as parents and ever blame herself? I don’t mean to sound negative but although I’m only seven years into motherhood, I have questions like this myself. Sometimes I catch my mom just staring at me and I wonder what she sees. Happy Birthday, Mom!!!

Mommy and Me Mondays #4- The Hedlin Family

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How many children do you have and what are their ages?
I have 3 boys. My baby is Nathan and will be 4 on June 20th, my middle son is Lucas and he  just turned 7 and my oldest son is William and he  is 10.5.
 
What is ONE song that reminds you of your child(ren)?
I have two. Sorry. Let them be Little by Billy Dean and Here I am by Bryan Adams. I used both songs in my oldest son’s preschool slideshow and now I can’t listen to either one with out bawling. I can’t imagine going back and watching that today after more than 5 years have passed.
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How would you define your style of parenting?
I am an “anything goes” parent. We are very eclectic and we go with the flow. What worked last month may not work this week and you have to adjust or everyone will go crazy. 
Do you have a restaurant or favorite place that you will only go with your child(ren)?
Not really, unless you count their activities or the park. We do frequent Chick-fil-a with the kids but we would do that with or without them. Maybe we need a “special place” that is ours and the kids. Hmmm. Now you have me thinking.
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What is one piece of advice you would give your child(ren) that can apply to their entire life?
PLEASE, Be yourself and always trust that no matter what you decide or what you tell us we will love you unconditionally.

 

Faithful Friday #2-Keep on the Sunny Side

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For some reason, this song that I heard last year on HBO’s series Getting On has made its way to Faithful Fridyas. It was sung by a young woman while a woman in the hospital was fighting for her life. It stuck in my head then and recently, it’s been back on my mind.As hard as it is to “keep on the sunny side”, I have to remember it will always be worth it!

You May Quote #7

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I love this quote! I got it from the Pinterest board of GG Renee. When I graduated from high school and received my high school year book, there was no picture of me. The reason being was the day I was scheduled to take my yearbook photo, I was in my guidance counselor’s office bearing my soul about the illicit relationship I was having with Bubba’s father. But that’s a later discussion. Anyway, when I remembered that I didn’t take my picture, I didn’t care, I drowned myself in the over 1500 students in my high school. I wasn’t a part of any extracurricular clubs, sports teams, or committees. I was a writer on the school newspaper, The Highlighter, but no one read it. My friends were few and even though they loved me,I never felt I truly belonged to them anyway.I remember a girl my best friend used to hang out with came up to her one day and asked her why she hung out with me. “She’s weird you know, always hanging out in the library or writing something down” she said. I was sitting right there while this girl acted like I was invisible. And I was. Still am but now I embrace it. I love me because I’m weird and I like indie films and books in a world that gets praised for sameness and trendy.Don’t get me wrong, I do like some trends, but I prefer to start my own…even if I’m the only one following it.

Mommy and Me Mondays #3-The Alvarez Grewe Family

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How many children do you have and what are their ages?

I have three daughters: Annabelle is 5, Solmarie is 7 and Gabby is 8 going on 16. I also have a husband who is 30 going on 18.

 

What is ONE song that reminds you of your child(ren)?

Eye of the Tiger by Katy Perry

 

How would you define your style of parenting?

I consistently flip flop between free range parenting (when I’m blogging) and helicopter parenting (when I’m not on the computer). But I am a huge fan of Erik Erikson’s Theory of Cognitive Development, and I kind of mix that up with Abraham Maslow, Piaget and little touch of Freud (for that extra zing). Nobody appreciates my parenting, and some accuse me of spoiling my children (pampered, my children are pampered), but my kids are happier, smarter and nicer than their kids so ha to them.  I also believe in confident parenting, where you follow your instinct and not the voices of overly critical self absorbed idiots.

 

Do you have a restaurant or favorite place that you will only go with your child(ren)?

Chuck E Cheese and a huge pool that calls themselves a water park (it does have a pirate ship, 2 slides and a lazy river).

 

What is one piece of advice you would give your child(ren) that can apply to their entire life?

Never lose faith in God and doing the right thing. No matter how many weak sheep you run into guised as assholes making you doubt your ways, you will always have something they don’t if you keep doing the right thing with fierce determination, and that’s character, dignity, and a clear conscience. The real reward for righteousness isn’t meant to be given in life, but in death, but they say only the righteous shall see God, so the more you do the right thing and the more you love instead of hate, and the more you embrace the light instead of the darkness, the closer you’ll get to seeing God before your death.

MICHELLE IS CURRENTLY HOLDING A CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS FOR A COUPLE ANTHOLOGIES. IF YOU THINK YOU’D BE INTERESTED OR WANT ADDITIONAL INFORMATION, HEAD OVER TO http://thewritemoms.com/call-for-submissions/